Shit that just bugs me... I'm shooting for 50:
1. That guy who is ALWAYS sleeping in the handicapped stall anytime I go to the men's room at work at lunch.
2. Speaking of bathrooms, any guy that puts his hands on his hips when he's at the urinal... STOP THAT!
3. People who DON'T call you to tell you plans are cancelled until a couple or three hours beforehand.
4. People who don't call until an HOUR OR LESS beforehand.
5. People who don't fucking call at ALL to cancel but later give YOU shit for not just assuming they cancelled when you didn't hear from them.
6. Drunk people who get mad at me for not being drunk. Sorry, buddy, but I just showed up!
7. Dog owners who don't immediately get onto their dog when it jumps up on company and that company obviously ain't too keen on it. "Oh, he just likes you." It's one thing to have a free-spirited dog...I encourage that... but it's another to not control it around company.
8. Seeing people go out of their way to run over ANY animal in the road.
9. Especially squirrels.
10. Trailers that give away KEY PLOT POINTS to a movie.
11. Trailers that don't tell you SHIT about the movie.
12. People who smile too big for EVERY picture.
13. Porn actresses who smile and look at the camera too much.
14. Any person in their thirties who gets upset when Timmy at McDonalds calls them "sir" or "ma'am" at the counter. Fuck you, you ARE old to them!!
15. Women who freak out when you ask them their age.
16. People who look at me funny when I ask what toy is in the happy meals that week. This is especially true if it's the staff.
17. The fact that I feel the need sometimes to pretend I'm buying them for "my kids".
18. People who tell me that I will meet that "certain someone" once I "stop looking for her". What the hell does that even MEAN?!!?
19. Anyone who cheated on their ex but still is sad that the relationship ended.
20. Anyone who BLAMES their ex cheating on THEM for causing them to cheat.
21. Any woman who gets upset that I actually might be dating someone else after our first "date". It reminds me of a friend's saying about jobs... "I was unemployed when I found THIS job so fuck it."
22. Movies that build towards a climax that never comes.
23. WOMEN who build towards a climax that never comes. :)
24. People who take everything I say as a criticism. Sometimes a commetn is just a comment and not a value judgment.
25. People who still think W is doing a damn fine job.
26. Anyone who instantly calls me "Bill".
27. Girls who think it's cute to call me "Willy".
28. People who cut ME off in traffic and then give ME the finger because I was, apparently, in THEIR way.
29. People who feel the need to tell me how Jesus changed their life while I'm standing in a line.
30. People who pick up a book in a book store, walk around with it and then put it back on ANY shelf they feel like.
31. Not being able to find a book I'm looking for even though inventory shows they "have one copy"... probably because of that fucker who took it on a tour.
32. Musicians who act like they're doing YOU a favor by playing for you. Shit, I show some love to that black guy at Bourbon Street playing a sax any time he does the Barney Miller theme. Why? Cause he always pauses a moment to say thanks.
33. Those plastic stickers on cds and dvds that leave some sticky residue behind so they stick to anything near them.
34. Melanie Griffith appearing in ANYTHING.
35. Anyone who tells me they didn't ask for my opinion. Fucker, I didn't ask YOU for permission to have it.
36. People with more facial piercings than I have buttons on my shirt who act insulted when you stare at them.
37. People with piercings or tattoos that get uppity whenever someone asks "Did that hurt?"
38. People that don't respond to emails or messages.
39. Guys that see a woman being passed out as an opportunity to fool around with them.
40. Women who don't see this happening as a REASON to be CAUTIOUS.
41. Women who cheat on their boyfriend or husband repeatedly who won't break it off.
42. Pretty girls who pretend to think they're ugly.
43. People who don't actually READ what I write or LISTEN to what I say but still get mad at me for what they are pretty sure I meant.
44. Women who expect a guy to go down on THEM but won't return the favor. Swallow or don't, I don't care, but don't expect ME to get a mouthful of your nether waste and not expect a little sumpin sumpin in return.
45. Guys who won't go down on a woman.
46. Women freaking out over their wedding. Sorry, but this bugs me. My personal belief is that more concern and thought should be given to the MARRIAGE than the fucking one day party.
47. People who think diamonds are rare. Wanna know why they cost so much? Ask the diamond people.
48. Anyone who lets simple words and names bother them. Sorry, I can't get too upset about someone calling me honkey or whitey or cracker and those people who know me know that I have BEEN the minority and those names weren't thrown out WITHOUT some serious anger behind them. IT wasn;t the words that bugged me, though... it was the anger.
49. Right-to-Lifers who are so stubborn they can't or won't accept that when it comes to choosing between the life of the mother and the unborn child, it should be the MOTHER. Sure, that's a personal opinion but I always lean more towards protecting the one who can always have another kid.
50. Anyone who reads all these and comes away thinking I'm just a sad, bitter person. Not true. Just a bit pissed off at someone right now and I can't lambast HER so I am venting THIS way.
Anyhwho... I got my fifty... feel free to add some here.
And go see Clerks II.. I laughed my ass off. Got to tears a couple of times. And stay thru the credits and see my name!! :) Yes, I'm a geek.
2. Speaking of bathrooms, any guy that puts his hands on his hips when he's at the urinal... STOP THAT!
3. People who DON'T call you to tell you plans are cancelled until a couple or three hours beforehand.
4. People who don't call until an HOUR OR LESS beforehand.
5. People who don't fucking call at ALL to cancel but later give YOU shit for not just assuming they cancelled when you didn't hear from them.
6. Drunk people who get mad at me for not being drunk. Sorry, buddy, but I just showed up!
7. Dog owners who don't immediately get onto their dog when it jumps up on company and that company obviously ain't too keen on it. "Oh, he just likes you." It's one thing to have a free-spirited dog...I encourage that... but it's another to not control it around company.
8. Seeing people go out of their way to run over ANY animal in the road.
9. Especially squirrels.
10. Trailers that give away KEY PLOT POINTS to a movie.
11. Trailers that don't tell you SHIT about the movie.
12. People who smile too big for EVERY picture.
13. Porn actresses who smile and look at the camera too much.
14. Any person in their thirties who gets upset when Timmy at McDonalds calls them "sir" or "ma'am" at the counter. Fuck you, you ARE old to them!!
15. Women who freak out when you ask them their age.
16. People who look at me funny when I ask what toy is in the happy meals that week. This is especially true if it's the staff.
17. The fact that I feel the need sometimes to pretend I'm buying them for "my kids".
18. People who tell me that I will meet that "certain someone" once I "stop looking for her". What the hell does that even MEAN?!!?
19. Anyone who cheated on their ex but still is sad that the relationship ended.
20. Anyone who BLAMES their ex cheating on THEM for causing them to cheat.
21. Any woman who gets upset that I actually might be dating someone else after our first "date". It reminds me of a friend's saying about jobs... "I was unemployed when I found THIS job so fuck it."
22. Movies that build towards a climax that never comes.
23. WOMEN who build towards a climax that never comes. :)
24. People who take everything I say as a criticism. Sometimes a commetn is just a comment and not a value judgment.
25. People who still think W is doing a damn fine job.
26. Anyone who instantly calls me "Bill".
27. Girls who think it's cute to call me "Willy".
28. People who cut ME off in traffic and then give ME the finger because I was, apparently, in THEIR way.
29. People who feel the need to tell me how Jesus changed their life while I'm standing in a line.
30. People who pick up a book in a book store, walk around with it and then put it back on ANY shelf they feel like.
31. Not being able to find a book I'm looking for even though inventory shows they "have one copy"... probably because of that fucker who took it on a tour.
32. Musicians who act like they're doing YOU a favor by playing for you. Shit, I show some love to that black guy at Bourbon Street playing a sax any time he does the Barney Miller theme. Why? Cause he always pauses a moment to say thanks.
33. Those plastic stickers on cds and dvds that leave some sticky residue behind so they stick to anything near them.
34. Melanie Griffith appearing in ANYTHING.
35. Anyone who tells me they didn't ask for my opinion. Fucker, I didn't ask YOU for permission to have it.
36. People with more facial piercings than I have buttons on my shirt who act insulted when you stare at them.
37. People with piercings or tattoos that get uppity whenever someone asks "Did that hurt?"
38. People that don't respond to emails or messages.
39. Guys that see a woman being passed out as an opportunity to fool around with them.
40. Women who don't see this happening as a REASON to be CAUTIOUS.
41. Women who cheat on their boyfriend or husband repeatedly who won't break it off.
42. Pretty girls who pretend to think they're ugly.
43. People who don't actually READ what I write or LISTEN to what I say but still get mad at me for what they are pretty sure I meant.
44. Women who expect a guy to go down on THEM but won't return the favor. Swallow or don't, I don't care, but don't expect ME to get a mouthful of your nether waste and not expect a little sumpin sumpin in return.
45. Guys who won't go down on a woman.
46. Women freaking out over their wedding. Sorry, but this bugs me. My personal belief is that more concern and thought should be given to the MARRIAGE than the fucking one day party.
47. People who think diamonds are rare. Wanna know why they cost so much? Ask the diamond people.
48. Anyone who lets simple words and names bother them. Sorry, I can't get too upset about someone calling me honkey or whitey or cracker and those people who know me know that I have BEEN the minority and those names weren't thrown out WITHOUT some serious anger behind them. IT wasn;t the words that bugged me, though... it was the anger.
49. Right-to-Lifers who are so stubborn they can't or won't accept that when it comes to choosing between the life of the mother and the unborn child, it should be the MOTHER. Sure, that's a personal opinion but I always lean more towards protecting the one who can always have another kid.
50. Anyone who reads all these and comes away thinking I'm just a sad, bitter person. Not true. Just a bit pissed off at someone right now and I can't lambast HER so I am venting THIS way.
Anyhwho... I got my fifty... feel free to add some here.
And go see Clerks II.. I laughed my ass off. Got to tears a couple of times. And stay thru the credits and see my name!! :) Yes, I'm a geek.
posted by wmjwatson at 9:27 PM
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